Thursday, June 30, 2011

7 Things NOT to Say to Your Wife...

1.  We're having that for supper???
Husbands, the fact is that if your wife cared for you enough to plan a dinner menu, make a grocery list, haul herself and perhaps a whiny kid or two with her to the grocery store, then back home to even make dinner, it really doesn't matter what it is...just eat it and smile.

2.  I don't hate it, but it's not my favorite outfit you own.
Men! Us ladies do not always have the opportunity to put thought and time into getting ourselves all dolled up.  Whenever we do manage to take a moment and brush our hair and try to look nice, let us be excited about our new outfit...chances are you are behind in the fashion world and what you deem not your "favorite" is probably the latest and chic-est style to be wearing!  Unless we are walking out of the house with hot pants or two different shoes on, let us be!

3.  Didn't those pants use to be loose on you?
This one needs no explanation.

4.  So, what did you do today?
If you walk in the house and it seems to be a disaster zone, this is the last thing your wife wants to hear.  More than likely, she has two eyeballs and can see that her house is far from pristine.  What you probably don't know is that she spent the entire day washing and folding clothes, scrubbing a smooshed strawberry out of the carpet,  satisfying a grumpy and needy 2 year old, making lunch and cleaning up the lunch mess all the while trying to figure out how her lipgloss ended up on the wall and why the stashed bag of candy is MIA.  Just because the house isn't spotless doesn't mean the your wife had a luxurious day doing nothing.

5. When is our anniversary???
Even if you truly can't remember, don't ask your wife.  Call your mom or mother-in-law, or better yet, go look at the marriage license! But please, don't ask us when one of the most important days of our lives took place.

6. Are you going to finish that?
If our fork is still in our hand and we haven't offered you our plate full of food that we've only had 2 bites of, then YES, we are indeed going to finish that.  Calm down, sit back and quit drooling.

7. I'll take the trash out in just a minute.
We know that when you say that it's just your way of getting us off your back long enough to forget we asked you to take it out to begin with and the trash will still be full and running over the next day.  If your wife asks nicely for you to take out the trash, your best response would be to just do  Especially if she's in the kitchen cooking your supper and trying to figure out where to put the germ-filled, empty chicken package that needs to go in a trash can, asap.

So, what should you say?
Honey, baby, darling...I know sometimes I can be a pain but I wanted to let you know that you do such a good job with the kids and keeping the house running.  I appreciate you even though I don't always show it. I LOVE YOU!

**Disclaimer:  I actually have a VERY amazing husband.  I can't say that he is an offender of all the above statements, but definitely a few of them and that's all it took for him to remember not to say them again :-)  I seriously can't complain too much about a man who cleans my house from top to bottom while I'm out of town...and does the laundry!

***2nd disclaimer: I can't even imagine what his list of 7 things would say about me!  If he reads this, he may come up with a list of a lot more than 7 things that wives shouldn't say to their husbands! Eeek! :-)


Angela said...

LOL too funny- but sooooo true!

Tina said...

Those are definitely good ones and true to fact, but I'm afraid that you will most likely hear them again and again. The joys of being married! :-)

Jessi said...

hahahaha! LOVE THIS.